Swingers Tips

Tips and suggestions for swingers, or those who might want to give it a try

• The swinger lifestyle community is experiencing booming growth as more and more couples and singles decide to relax their inhibitions and explore their sexuality. This is totally natural and nothing to be ashamed about! However, as with all social experiences, there are some definite DO's and DON'Ts. A little common courtesy goes a long way to smoothing what can be, at times, (especially for beginners) a slightly awkward experience.

• The Golden Rule: "NO means NO". Anyone may say "NO" for any reason at any time even if you are in the middle of a swinging encounter and have changed your mind and want to stop it right there! If you are in a situation that makes you uncomfortable, just say "No". Do not jeopardize your happiness and satisfaction with this lifestyle, or that of your partner, by doing something against your will just because you are afraid to say no. The friendliest way is to say, "Oh no thank you, but thanks for asking". No one should be pressured or coerced under any circumstances. Swinging is an individual’s personal choice and a disinterested person need merely say "No, thank you." "No thank you" means NO.

• Be honest initially, and you will avoid any misunderstandings.

• Always treat one another with respect. After all, this is a party!!!! Besides, you don’t want to be rude or judgmental, because you wouldn’t want it to happen to you. If a single gentleman talks to you and you are interested in swinging with couples only, that doesn’t mean you can’t be nice to him. He’s a person just like you! Just politely let him know.

• ALCOHOL OR DRUGS - At times, a few drinks are nice to help you "relax". Over-indulging may hamper your physical abilities, as well as offend or turn other people off to you. If you have to over indulge in order to participate in swinging, you are involved in the wrong lifestyle.

• Another rule of swinging is "consenting". Both parties must agree that they are mutually interested in what they have to offer to each other. Swinging is an individuals personal choice and no one is ever under any obligation to participate. If you are rejected (and it happens to everyone, including women), Do NOT take personal offense.

• Rejection is a very personal thing, and it’s almost as hard to reject as it is to be rejected. Honesty with each other is crucial.

• Deal with jealousy head on! It is a normal reaction. Discover what triggers jealousy in your relationship and work it out together. It may mean modifying your activities, but your relationship together is not worth jeopardizing over swinging.

• Remember that this is strictly a physical & recreational pleasure, not an emotional one.

• Always let your steady partner know she/he is number one. Arrive together, take time to caress them, touch base often, it makes one feel secure. And always leave together.

• Honor any and all prior understandings & rules you have made between each other, and be sure to communicate with each other openly and honestly so there are no misunderstandings about your rules.

• Respect the guidelines you set as a couple and communicate them to prospective partners. Open, honest communication is imperative. And please don’t forget to respect the guidelines of others. Don’t try to "talk them into" changing the rules because you just want to get laid!

• Pay attention to body language. There is more to interaction than words. Consider the body language of the person you are talking with and it will tell you more than the conversation you are having! Be sensitive to the person and you will know what makes them uncomfortable or happy and excited.

• Demand absolute discretion! And be worthy of the same. Discretion is paramount in this lifestyle! Privacy is imperative!!! Never, ever discuss details inappropriately. Everything you do, everything you see, MUST remain private.

• Swinging is about having a good time. Live some fantasies explore your sexuality and enjoy! This lifestyle has plenty to offer with clothes on as well as off. Approach it with a positive attitude and a sense of humor.

• Swingers are dedicated family people, or committed couples, who have successfully separated sex from love, not love from sex. Sex within the framework of marriage or commitment is a moving, emotional, and spiritual experience of immeasurable beauty and excitement. Sex in a swinging situation is a stimulating, satisfying "change of pace" that satisfies the libido and curiosity. Swinging sex (recreational sex with friends) is satisfying, exciting, and enjoyable because when you are in love with your mate, your experiences and theirs are one.

• You should expect tolerance and respect. You both must give the same. You don’t know what someone is about, unless you chat with them. Social skill is the number one attribute to a successful swinging couple. Remember, everyone there is there to meet people so don't be shy to introduce yourself. Nothing is expected just because you engage in conversation. Your ability to find those with like-minded interests, will dictate how far you can fulfill your fantasies.

• Is acceptable to just dance and socialize? Absolutely, and many members come only to do just that. There is something very liberating about being with like-minded individuals, dancing, dressing sexy, flirting, all in very sexually charged atmosphere without pressure. Our goal is to provide our members with a safe, pressure free environment, to fuel the passion or satisfy the curiosity. The choice is yours to hook-up or not. Just have fun.

• If you are too shy to introduce yourself to a couple or single woman, feel free to ask the hosts for an introduction. They are more than happy to initiate an introduction.

• It is totally normal to be nervous, and actually, even though a couple seems totally cool and "seasoned", EVERYONE has some sort of nervous anticipation about meeting new people. Remember what it was like when you met your partner for the first time? Well it's the same thing, but at least you can approach it as a team!
• If it seems like everyone knows each other, they really don't. Many are just very outgoing and know what to expect and get right to it by chatting it up. There are however many couples who return for every event and get to know each other. Everyone is still there to meet new people so again, don't be shy. You will be welcomed with a smile, a warm and friendly "Hello" and most likely introduced to some more people.

• If you know there is mutual interest in hooking-up, but no one is making the move, ask them if they would like to go someplace private to chat, like on of our plush private rooms. When your in there, start flirting and kissing you partner, this will usually get the ball rolling. The rest will happen naturally, but remember, don't force anything and be respectful.

LifeStyle Definitions

AC/DC - Bi-Sexual Person(s)
Arts - Fetishes
B&D or BD - Bondage and Discipline
Back Door - Anal Sex
BBW - Big Beautiful Woman. Larger than average woman that is very beautiful regardless of size or weight.
BDSM - Bondage - Discipline - SadoMasochism
BI or Bisexual - Someone that enjoys sex with both men and women.
Bi-Curious - Someone that is curious, interested in or has had limited Bisexual experience.
Bondage - The practice of restraining a person(s) for sexual pleasure.
Can Entertain - Someone that has a private location and is willing to invite others over.
Can Travel - Someone that is willing to travel, generally beyond an hours drive.
Clean - Diseases and Drug Free
Couple - Two people, generally one male, one female.
CPL - Couple
Cunnilingus - Oral stimulation of the vagina/clitoris
DD - Clean, disease and drug free.
Discipline - Spanking, bondage or similar practice intended to arouse sexual desire.
DP - Double Penetration, simultanious Vaginal and Anal.
Entertain - Can Entertain
Exhibitionism - Showing off in public, involving nudity.
F - Female
Fellation - Oral stimulation of the penis
Fetish - Sexual stimulation via non sexual acts or objects.
Full Swap - A couple that enjoys sexual pleasure with others that includes anything up to AND including intercourse.
Gay - Homosexual, generally a male, but not always.
GBM - Gay Black Man
GWM - Gay White Male
Heterosexual - One who enjoys and has sex with only the opposite sex.
Homosexual - One who enjoys and has sex with only the same sex.
Hung - One with a large penis
HWP - Height/Weight Proportionate. Someone that is not overweight or underweight.
ISO - In Search Of
Lesbian - Gay women.
LTR - Long Term Relationship
M - Male
MBC - Married Black Couple
MBiC - Married Bi Couple
MILF - Mother I'd Like (to) Fuck
Moresome - More than four.
MWC - Married White Couple
Off-Premise - A swing club or party where there are no designated locations for play. This may or may not exclude the activity from actually taking place.
P/P - Photo/Phone
S&M or SM - Sadism/Masochism
Safe - Someone that is not at risk for becoming or causing a pregnancy.
SBF - Single Black Female
SBiF - Single Bi Female
SBiM - Single Bi Male
SBM - Single Black Male
SGL - Single
Sodomy - Usually Anal sex, possibly forced.
Soft Swing/Swingers - A couple that enjoys sexual pleasure with others that includes anything up to but not including intercourse.
STD - Sexually Transmitted Disease.
STR8 or STR or Straight - Straight, a Heterosexual person.
Swap or Swapping - Two couples exchanging partners
SWF - Single White Female
SWM - Single White Male
Versatile - Bisexual
Voyeur or Voyeurism - One who enjoys watching.
Water Sports - Urination involving sexual stimulation.